Alfred’s Memorial Day Ode To The Cats Who Came Before Him
June 2, 2012
Hello again my Loyal Fans!
Alfred here. KING Alfred. I know I’m late with my Memorial Day piece. But, my Moms has been too busy to help me with my blog. And, I want to give an ode – a shout out – to all of my Moms’ cats who came before me. I wasn’t my Moms’ first cat. There were a lot of others who came before me.
There was Dulce, the Cambodian cat, who Moms gave to her housekeeper in Phnom Penh when she left. Sometimes, Moms still mistakes me for Dulce and calls me her name. Dulce was Moms cat in 2001. But, before Dulce there was Feliz – yeah… Moms was into naming her cats Spanish names back then. Feliz was really feliz. She was Moms cat in 2000 and was born in the driveway where my Moms worked. When her brother was run over by a car, Moms took Feliz home with her. Feliz jumped out of the window and got eaten by the neighbor’s dog. Felice and Dulce were girl cats, and Feliz was Moms very favorite cat… until she got me of course…
Before them there were Simone and Gloria back in Mauritania 1991- 94. Yeah, as in Gloria Steinman and Simone de Beauvoir. In Tunisia, my Moms had Q’atoosha (that’s Arabic for “cat”) and Fatma (the name of the Prophet’s daughter), and then in Niger in 1987 Moms had a whole slew of cats. She only remembers Catherine and Samir. But, she had around 5 cats.
But, I’m Moms’ first real male cat, and I’ve totally turned things around in my Moms life by…
“Are you on the computer again…? Didn’t I tell you go to clean up your litter box before you got on the computer?!”
“But, Moms… I’m writing my Memorial Day piece. Remember you told me you were going to help me an’ all and then you got busy and now I’m late…?”
“Boy! Get off that computer! What are you telling those people any way? Are you showing off again, telling those people how great you are? Do those people who read your blog know how untidy you are and about all your emotional issues…? Do they know you left your litter box in the Benz 7 months ago, and I’m still riding around with a litter box with old cat poop in it? Do you know how embarrassing this is for me?!”
“But, Moms, you told me you were going to take out the litter box from the Benz. You know I can’t lift it up…”
“Alfred, are you whining again?! Since when is YOUR litter box MY problem? Do you know yesterday your Cousin Paula rode in the Benz with me and looked back and saw your dirty litter box…”
Uh… Sorry, Guys… I gotta go… My Moms is outta control!